8 hours in Malacca

One of our random plan, drive down to Malacca to catch a movie (our free tickets only applicable outside of Klang Valley). Where else is better than the historical town. I love the building and culture left off by the Portuguese and the Dutch.

I enjoy my company who don't complain about the heat while walking under the burning sun. Or the sudden rain in the middle of the day. Everything was simply positive and enjoyable :D

My 101 List

If it was not because of a gentle reminder from my dear friend Justo, hailing all the way from Honduras, I would have forgotten about this blog. I miss you buddy!!!

I just started working in the corporate world early this month since my graduation. To be very honest, I feel a huge chunk missing in my life. Feeling deeply empty in my heart. I didn't know what was gone. Every single day, without fail while taking the LRT (or the subway) I keep thinking " what is it, where is it, how should I do about it, why is it so". As I am trying to find answers to all these endless, baseless questions, loneliness and depression are beginning to tap on my shoulder. NO, I can't feel sad for myself. I want to be alive. Listen, I have to shrug depression away because I don't want to leave any space within my heart for it. I afraid that it would eat me up. Before that could happen, I made a list. As I write them down one by one, I begin to feel alive again. Then I realised that what have been missing all these while is FUN. There is no foundation of fun for the past few months, NADA... I was too serious and harsh on myself. Yes, before this I was pressured because I have the impression that I could not meet the expectation the society impose on me. Couldn't find a good job, with a good pay, buy a house, get a car, plan for early retirement and blah blah blah... For now, I don't want to discuss about that kind of list. The list that I want to share here sounds like this:

• Run a marathon
• Read a book in a day
• Do something artsy and crafty every Sunday for 2 months continuously
• Eat 7 things I've never tried before
• Cook 5 things I've never cooked before
• Make a photo book with my favourite pictures
• Make a scrapbook of places I've been before in Europe
• Get a facial appointment
• Try manicure and pedicure
• Go to a live musical show
• Stop talking for 10 minutes while the live band is playing in the bar
• Buy a new mattress
• Visit 5 more countries (0/5)
• Go to New York
• Bake a cake
• Read 10 biographies/ non-fiction books (0/10)
• Plant a rosemary
• Buy a new smartphone
• Compliment at a person a day
• Give at least 10 speeches
• Blog once a week (1/45)
• Make a teddy bear out of felt
• Sing out loud

So far, that is all that I could think of. I will think for more while I have to be committed to ACTUALLY do them.

Nothing...

I hate the feeling when you have no emotions. You are neither happy nor sad. Simply feeling empty inside. You are nothing. When your head is spinning really hard, but you can't feel anything.

Have courage

You know, I am happy that my Dad is my Dad. He is the best father in the whole world. In my world of course. To this day, now, I am 23 and he haven't really scold or yell at me before. Whenever I make any mistake, he would always smile and says 'it's okay'. Take this evening for example, I tried to make double chocolate chips cookies, while mixing the dough, I broke the wooden spoon. And he said it's alright and use a new spoon. Then, I stop a minute and flash back. I realized that this is not the first time. My Dad has been very patience and nice to me ever since I was a little girl. He taught me that it is okay to fail, make mistake, be silly, be embarrassed and angry at myself. But, you must be able to stand up again after falling. To have the courage to try again, or start over and believe that the world is not at the end yet.

One day, I want to go New York :)